Amazon might have picked the wrong day to celebrate AWSome Day

For generations now, AWSome Day has been one of our most cherished holidays. In a time of turmoil and strife, AWSome Day offers us all a chance to take a step back, relax, and undergo essential training to get our cloud businesses off the ground. For as long as anyone can remember, AWSome Day has passed without incident. And today looked to be just like any other AWSome Day, as you can see from this tweet.

But as the sun rose above Edinburgh this morning, terrible things were afoot on the S3 servers. For reasons that are still unknown, Amazon’s web hosting service collapsed this morning. And when it did, it took all of the internet’s most important services — namely, Trello, Quora, and Is It Down Right Now — down with it.

As a result, AWSome Day has been completely ruined. Parents are getting drunk on wine they bought with Prime shipping and children are going to bed without watching the second season finale of Mozart in the Jungle. Some Scots have reportedly been shouting obscenities at their Echo devices for hours, asking Alexa to do things that would be anatomically impossible even if she had an anatomy.

With AWSome Day comes awesome responsibility. And on this day, the world failed us.